Catch up

Hello one and all!

So much to cover and so busy that I seriously doubt i'll manage to do it all justice! Indeed, I am entirely unprepared to be blogging today having taken no photo's! Thus I need you all to plug back in your imaginations. You remember, those things that we used before the modern world began to bombard us with images, when we read novels, not text messages, surfed waves, not the internet and played in the playground instead of on games consoles.

Had a few days off recently and had a wonderful time. Wednesday saw me at my sisters, indulging in a new haircut and a variety of beauty treatments. I've been waxed, plucked, massaged and tinted all over in preparation for the wedding this Friday! Such a lot of effort for one day but I'm sure it will be evry special. Picked up my suit this afternoon too so desperately hoping that I've not put on any weight since I went for my fitting (I'll just kill myself if I have - it was only five weeks ago!).

On Thursday Nathan wanted to go to Thorpe Park so off we trotted. Not my scene really. I don't understand the compulsion behind paying out £35 quid to be thrown around in circles and sprayed with water. Some unsteady garden furniture and a length of hose would, in my opinion, do the same job! Nonetheless, we did go and it wasn't as awful as I'd imagined it to be. I staved off the desire to pack my knitting, though I do think that completing a row whilst plummeting hundreds of feet on a rolercoaster would elevate me to the level of master knitter, truly skilled!

Friday was my choice for the entertainment and our feet remaimed firmly on the ground as I led Nathan around Hampton Court and its grounds. What a lovely couple of hours that was, all the better because the short series of showers seemed to have kept many of the parent-child parties inside their own homes. I have nothing against children - i'd just rather not see or hear any! If anybody out there is able to make a trip to Hampton Court, I sincerely suggest that they do!

On Saturday we took a brief trip to the Royal Egham Show. I wont bother to elaborate any further. It was a complete waste of time. They charged six pounds per person for entry (and I do understand that there are costs to cover)but the entire effort seemed pretty half hearted. If all of the food stalls were removed then the 'exhibitors' list would have been reduced by about 50%. The same situation again when it came to tombola's offering as prizes what was clearly the unpacked contents of bin liners that had been left outside charity shops. I always wondered why they have signs outside saying 'Please do not leave carrier bags outside the charity shop. They WILL be stolen'. Now I know why...... Furthermore, the 'craft' tent featured a multitude of stalls selling everything from plastic jewellery to 80's style hand knitted baby jumpers in god-awful shades of acrylic. I know it all comes down to taste.... but please? Nathan now thinks I am a craft snob but I can live with that.

To turn to my own crafting pursuits, I've been busy with a variety of things. I'm still working on a HUGE felted bag that is to be given away as a Christmas gift. I also finished a felted hat based on a design by Nicky Epstein. I'm pretty pleased with it. It's a gorgeous deep shade of purple/red that Nathan spun by hand with some Angelina fibre to give it some extra sparkle! Glorious! This is also to be a gift but I can't say anymore yet! In fact, we've decided this year that we are having an entirely handmade Christmas. We intend to do little xmas hampers for all our friends and relatives. Nathan is a fiend in the kitchen when it comes to xmas cakes and jams/preserves, plus all of our knitting and crochet items. It's not even about the recession, just a desire to get back to a time when less was more!

Has anybody read 'The Friday Night Knitting Club'? I recently discovered the joys of audiobooks and listened to the entire novel whilst knitting this weekend. It wasn't in the least taxing, indeed, the entire thing was something of a cliche for the genre. Nonetheless, it was hugely enjoyable and far superior to watching re-runs of 'Friends' on TV (why does Friends seem to be running on a loop these days? It should have its own channel!). It was actually quite nice to listen to what pretended to be nothing but a simple, nice story. I have a degree in English lit and used to feel terribly guilty if I was reading anything but the classics. Now though, I'm comfrotable with it. Who cares? Moreover, who wants some aged and infirm British actor narrating War and Peace in their ear whilst trying to navigate a tricky lace pattern?!

Pleased to report that my Boss has given the thumbs up to my suggestion that we take part in Take Your Dog To Work Day on September 16th, so Deny will be coming to play at my office for the day. Bruce is a bit of a nightmare, so Daddy Nathan is taking the day off to spend time with him alone. Ahhh!

I'll wrap things up for now as I am incredibly busy!

Just wanted to say hi before the wedding day.

Speak soon

M xxx

Free Pattern - Vianne

I'm very pleased to announce that I am finally able to offer my new pattern for the gloves below as a free download. Please feel free to use this pattern however you wish, though please contact me before any unauthorised distribution. For those of you that do not knit or have not knitted for a while - have a go! This is an easy beginners pattern with fantastic results. Much better than a garter stitch scarf any day!
















If anybody out there does knit a pair - I'd love to see some photo's!

DOWNLOAD FILE

Pure indulgence...

Well what an entirely indulgent weekend I've just had!

After taking my little babies out for a walk on saturday morning, followed by a quick blast of housework, Nathan and I decided to treat ourselves. Now, I dont pretend this isn't poncy. Indeed, I KNOW it is! But that's what makes it so enjoyable.

Nathan made a quick trip to the shops, while I pulled out all of my vintage china and laid the table. What followed was a gorgeous feast. We had a huge pot of leaf tea served in my favourite teapot and drinking out of my hand painted tea-cups. Two big plates of sandwiches - the traditional cucumber variety and some beef and mustard for a little more kick! Plus a cake-stand absolutely chocca full with slabs of rocky road, macaroons, butterfly cakes and other goodies. Some easy listening music on the stereo, the patio doors thrown open wide....it was bliss..... (And I wonder why I am the size I am.....)

After gorging myself so thoroughly that my mobility was seriously impaired, fending off the overwhelming temptation to have an afternoon nap, and succumbing to the desire to unbutton my trousers, I decided I really ought to get at loeast SOMETHING done. So I pulled out my laptop and began writing up my new pattern for Artisan Threads. I'd hoped to be able to upload it to my blog today to show you all, but it's not saved to my memory stick properly. Very frustrating. I do, however, have some pictures. So here goes. This is 'Vianne'. A beginner's pattern for simple fingerless lace gloves. I'm pretty proud of how they turned out, and I can just imagine them done in white or ivory silk for an autumnal wedding....


You'll have to excuse my chubby fingers! Unfortunately, in a male only household it is somewhat difficult to model feminine garments effectively! I just love the colours of the yarn though. This is a colourway called 'Terracotta' from Artisan Threads. It's a joy to knit with and luckily, the colours didn't seem to pool which can happen quite easily when using hand dyed yarn. If anybody is interested in purchasing this or any other yarn then please visit http://www.artisanthreads.co.uk/ On the other hand, if any of you are lucky enough to be attending 'fibrefest' in Devon this year, Gill will have a stand there so pop along and see her!

I finally finished another project that I've been working on this weekend too! I thought that this would be a gloriously simple but effective item that would take a matter of a few hours to complete. WRONG! Do you have any idea how long it takes to really encrust an area with different sized beads? I certainly didn't or I'm not sure I'd have started! It took forever! Nonetheless, I think my crocheted choker looks really striking. I've not named the item specifically, but I'm planning on doing a whole series of similar items and the line will be called the 'Geology Series'. That's because the inspiration behind the choker was the piece of rock that you can see behind it in the photographs. What do you think?

The choker is made from 100% cotton and is finished with a single vintage button. Again, the lack of a suitable model prevents me from showing you how it looks on (I was NOT about to take photographs with my hairy chest in the background!) but I can assure you that, twisted to one side, it clasps the throat perfectly and is more than comfortable to wear.

I really like this item. It's different to anything you can buy in the shops and with a simple black top it could make a real statement. Mind you, I'm something of a magpie when it comes to sparkles! I'm attracted to anything that glitters! I'm planning on putting this item for sale on my Folksy shop today. I wonder if anyone will buy it!







That was about it really in terms of crafting this weekend. Nathan did some spinning and I worked on a couple of other unfinished projects. Last week I completed the sketches for my next design and so I am just waiting to have a word with Nathan's mum to get her to send down the wool in order that I can knit the sample. I'm definitely going to start working on some men's patterns too! Honestly, men's patterns are so DULL! I know that, as a (seriously) gay man, my tastes probably differ from your average guy. I mean, I'd sooner shave all my hair off than wear a football shirt out of the house, and I don't even own a pair of trainers. Well, I don't run anywhere, so what's the point! But, why do designers assume that men, REAL MEAN RARGH, only wear shades of black, brown and blue? It drives me crazy! I'm not suggesting for a minute that we should all don paisley prints and large floral motifs every day of the week. But come on! I think that the colours we see every day can have a genuine effect on our moods. How can anyone expect to dispel the Monday Morning Blues when they are dressed for a funeral? (Although, in my office it is somewhat fitting to do so). In fact, and I know this is an extreme case, while browsing the internet last week, I came across a horrific website that was basically condemning all men that dared grow a fringe or wear shades of pink. These middle aged, utterly irrational neo-nazi's were proclaiming that men should be completely unconcerned with, entirely unaware even, of their own appearance. How outdated is that?! More to the point, the fact that this idiot felt the need to start an entire website dedicated to the issue somewhat undercut his own arguement, I thought. He was obviously painfully aware of his own appearance in comparison to others. And I bet he didn't use deodorant!!!!


On saturday night we popped over to see my friend Zola. It was a perfect evening. We fully exploited the remaining sunshine and sat in the garden late into the evening with scented candles burning and a bottle of champagne. I truly believe that in life you only find a handful of real friends and Zola is definitely one of them. She is so genuine and an amazing person to be around. Furthermore, being something of a miserable b*sta*d, it is unusual for me to find somebody that makes me have those full body convulsing fits of laughter that are so often a feature of our times together. She did tell me a hilarious story about her daughter while we were there. I hope she doesn't mind me sharing it with you as she did spend the entire ten minutes that I was rolling around the decking in fits of giggles interjecting with comments about what an awful mother she is for seeing the amusing side! It's a cliche, but so many of Zola's anecdotes rely on her style for telling them and this is something that I simply cannot replicate! The upshot of this one was that, whilst out shopping, Zola asked her daughter, Francesca, to pop over and put a baking tray back on the shelf. Evidently Fran tripped and made furious sprinting motions to try and steady herself again, only to fall face first into the baking tray and slide along the laminated floor of the store. It's terrible to laugh but I can gladly report that Francesca did not do herself any serious injuries!


My indulgent weekend ended with a fabulous roast dinner. Nathan was delighted with the fact that ALL of the vegetables were organically grown on the allotment. I, on the other hand, can only get so excited about a cabbage before my interest wanes! Credit where credit is due though - Nathans baby carrots in a honey glaze were to die for! I just wish there was some way that you all could try them! Nathan's also found a gorgeous recipe for muffins that he is going to try next weekend, so it doesn't look like I'm going to be getting any thinner! I don't know if I was lucky or unlucky to end up with somebody that is so good in the kitchen!


I'll end here, but it's been fabulous sharing with you guys and I promise I'll be back before long!


M xxx

Like I Never Left...

So it's been a really long time and I must apologise for that! I know all you cyber crafters love following your favourite blogs and I shouldn't have left it sooo long. The thing is, I've just been SO busy! I've literally not stopped and, for various reasons, my crafting horizons have been expanding beyond all recognition! I'm so terribly excited about this new phase I seem to be entering.

The countdown has finally begun for my Sister's wedding (4th September) so things have really started taking off in that department. The flowers are chosen, table linen has been ordered, the cake is waiting in the wings and we've -so far- had two bridal gowns (don't ask). The latter, and preffered, dress was in desperate need of taking up when we finally got our hands on it. My sister is only about 5ft, so even with skyscraper heels the dress was never going to be a perfect length. (Don't feel sorry for her - the jammy cow is practically perfect in every other way! Perfect white teeth, petite frame, gorgeous blonde hair and cheek bones that Julian Clarey would kill for! I, on the other hand, drew the short straw and took after my father. I got the round face, 5 o'clock shadow at 11am and hair that will, I am reliably informed, start to recede within the next five years!) Off we trotted to our local alteration place where Becky was asked to put the dress on so the hem could be pinned. The shop assistant merrily threw back the curtain of the 'changing room' to reveal a space about the size of a small espresso cup. Needless to say, the next five minutes were very hot as I wrestled my sister into the dress, pulling zips, hoisting the skirts in order that she could bend to do up her strappy heels, alternating between my denim clad behind sticking out between the drapes and her frilly red thonged one. By the time we catapulted ourselves out of the match box sized room, quite a large number of the shop staff had gathered together, supposedly to "look at the beautiful dress". Personally I think they were more curious about who the thong belonged too! One confused woman did look at me for a short moment with a slightly bemused expression on her face and a partially extended finger before quietly saying "The Groom?"...... "Nope, Gay Brother" I replied and the confusion vanished from her face. Anyways, that is all sorted now and I am pleased to report that the dress is exceptionally beautiful and ready for the big day....

There's not much else to report really. Nathan and I took a brief trip into London earlier this month. We were at a bit of a loose end so decided to go and have a rummage around in 'iKnit' London shop and then go for lunch. After eating, we felt too lazy to walk back to the station, so Nathan hailed one of those rickshaw contraptions that ride around all over the place. Have you seen them? I tell you, I've never felt so guilty about my weight in my entire life! Realistically, I'm not huge. 13 stone is, however, still overweight for somebody of my height. The entire duration of the ride, while Nathan giggled as we wooshed over cobbled streets and zipped in front of pedestrians, I was transfixed by the driver's calves! As his muscles pulsed and contracted under the effort of turning the pedals, I clenched my butt tighter and tighter in an effort to make his load lighter. Of course, the fact that I was already clenching came in pretty handy when we came face to face with a large black (insert car name here - I'm useless!) that seemed determined to run us off the road with nothing but a piddly bicycle bell for protection. Nonetheless, we arrived in one piece and while Nathan paid the fare, I managed a slight nod and a smile...my feeble apology for the beads of sweat that had formed on our driver's brow.....

I'd better turn to something crafty now - I don't wish to lose all of my followers! I've had a massive shift in perception these last few weeks and have discovered that, while I have a natural propensity to over-think EVERYTHING, I also have the ability to just jump in and get on with things. Having seen, and even featured here, various crafters that are in the business of making toys and softies, I decided that I wanted to have a go. In the absence of any tuition, I grabbed my sewing machine, a few pairs of socks and decided to muddle my way through making one of those adorable sock monkeys. All in all, i'm pretty pleased with him, and he has already been claimed by Nathan and re-homed in Richmond as the office mascot. There are a few things that I will be changing on subsequent chimps, but I love the fact that each monkey can have its own personality! There are endless opportunities to have fun with them! I may do an Amy Winehouse version with a huge beehive! What larks! Here he is before he was abducted:

I've also broken out of my comfort zone this month by having a go at making some jewellery. I don't intend to become a skilled silversmith and beading does not really hold an awful lot of interest for me. However, I do love a bit of quirky kitsch and so, having imported various beads and charms from China (thank heavens for Ebay!) and investing in sterling silver charm bracelets and split rings, I came up with my first design! I think this is so lively and fun, and would make the perfect summer accessory. This item is soon to be added to my folksy/etsy shop and there are more in the pipeline.

Nathan's mum was down from Scotland this weekend and stayed with us for one night on the way through to his Sister's. She is such an inspirational person to have around. I mentioned that I was starting to find knitting patterns a little too prescriptive and that I'd like to have a go at designing some smaller pieces on my own. While I'd have deliberated this until I was claiming my pension, Gill was very enthusiastic and suggested that we form a joint venture. Gill, as the founder of her own yarn company 'Artisan Threads', is looking for a few new patterns to be written using her latest range of yarn. The intention is for me to work on these with her to both highlight her products and develop my confidence with pattern writing. The patterns will remain my intellectual property, but as Gill has numerous contacts in the knitting world and spends plenty of time on the exhibition circuit, my designs should get plenty of exposure! All very exciting stuff. Thus far, I have started work on a crocheted choker and Victorian style lace gloves. It really is so liberating though to break out on your own, and with all the sketching and knitted swatches, calculating measurements and selecting colours, it does give you a real sense of validity and achievement, of legitimacy even. Who knows where this will lead but watch this space! Indeed, for my next blog, I am going to be constructing an entire feature around Artisan Threads and I hope to be able to give you all a really good look behind the scenes of the company, how the yarn is made, a sneak peek into the studio and a Q&A session with the woman herself! Feel free to send any questions to me that you'd like to put to Gill and i'll be sure to pass them on.

TTFN,

M xxx

Diana, Vanessa, Whitney & Mariah.....

Ok ok...so i'm a bad blogger. And, evidently a bad person.

I know I haven't blogged for a whole week but I wasn't sure anybody would want to talk to me! I know I made the fatal mistake of mentioning the sunshine last week and since then.....nothing but rain. Mind you, it could have been beautiful where you guys are. Maybe I only jinxed myself? Nonetheless, thanks to that HUGE black cloud that followed me around all week, I've had permanently wet washing hanging on the line (it became a matter of principle NOT to bring it in and put it into the tumble dryer!), a constantly evolving pattern of doggy footprints on the carpets, and enough frizzy hair to keep John Frieda in business for the next decade. It hasn't been pretty! For seven days I thought i'd died and been reincarnated into a Diana Ross wig.... but more about her later......

As promised, I'll get the updates done. Here are some pictures of the work I've been doing recently. The first thing I'll show is this basic red tote bag that I put together for myself! Not often I make anything for me and this will get used loads. It really is very simple, more about utility than aesthetics. I didn't even bother to line it (well, when your hair has turned to candy floss, nobody will be paying attention to your handbag, will they?!) I used a basic red cotton, my fab new singer sewing machine and the thread that I picked up in LIDL!!!! El cheapo, but I love it!

These baby booties were crocheted using a worsted weight merino yarn that I had left over in my workshop. I believe it is Malabrigo. Anyhow, I was pretty pleased with them. The pattern wasn't very clear after making the soles, so I kind of made it up off the top of my head after that. Still, I'm sure there'll be a bouncing bubba somewhere that will appreciate them! [I've been desperately trying to convince my sister to have a baby for quite some time now. She said originally that she was going to get married first, which is fine as that is only in September. But I am so impatient. I did recently threaten to knock her out and throw the ...err.... 'swimmers' up there myself. None of my own, I hasten to add.....]

I also promised to share with you all my my preliminary designs for a new top that i'm working on. Please don't all laugh! I don't profess to be an artist! The idea is that the front panels will only be attached to the back at one side, holding at the other with shoulder tabs and large buttons thus making it into a wraparound. I originally had this in mind as just a very basic daytime summer top. However, it occured to me that to use either a contrasting or toning sheer fabric at the bottom of all of the panels and creating a ruffled effect could convert this into quite a statement piece. Especially with the addition of beading, ribbons and other embellishments... This, in my eyes, is much more desirable! Subtlety has never been my strong point. Love a bit of wow factor!

My final picture is of the pencil rovings that were gifted to me by Nathan's mum. I've started knitting with them now. I'm using 6.5mm circular needles and knitting double stranded. The rovings are really quite delicate because the lack of twist means that the fibres just come apart if too much pressure is used. Because of this, the knitting is quite slow but I don't care! The colours are just beautiful and I feel like i'm playing with watercolour paint on a fresh new canvas. It is so satisfying to see the colours blending as I knit, and a final felting will only enhance this. I have stayed with my original idea - that is, to knit a vintage style handbag. I'm just making the pattern up as I go along at the moment, though i'm happy enough to do this as I am going to keep the complexity of the actual knitting to an absolute minimum in order to better showcase the yarn itself. The reason I said that I would return to Diana Ross later is that, having listened to her greatest hits album throughout the knitting of this piece (please, no comments using the words 'cliche' or 'stereotype'! I am well aware of how snugly I fit into gay popular culture!) I have decided to name the final bag 'Diana'. Ok, so in retrospect that little tidbit of info was far less interesting than I had anticipated.

Talking of Diva's, I'm so excited! Whitney Houston's first studio album in SEVEN YEARS is due for release on Septemeber 1st! I'm a die hard fan and may have to take a week off of work to learn all the lyrics! Furthermore, Mariah's new album 'Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel' is out on August 25th! Nathan detests my taste in music, referring collectively to my favourite artists as 'the whingers'! Needless to say, he is less than impressed with my daily ritual of prancing around with the hoover whilst listening to my cd's. I can't be sure, but I would suggest that this may have been what sparked his sudden interest in growing vegetables! These days he has a perfect life - by the time he returns from the allotment, not only has he avoided doing any housework but also bearing witness to me acting like a twat (his pet hate is my lip-syncing Whitney's quivering mouth during 'I will always love you'!!!!).

To finish up for today, I thought you might like to see some pictures of Archie playing in the garden with my sister. These were taken BEFORE the rain started! I went outside this morning because I could hear him whining. After checking behind various pots and over my neighbours fence, I discovered that he was on the roof of my shed! The poor little thing was calling to me and gingerly stepping onto the guttering to get himself down.....or so I thought. I perched on the edge of our low brick wall, reached up and strained to reach him. He seemed to be moving backwards and forwards, towards and then away from me, through fear. As I inched closer towards him and teetered on the very tip of my toes, suddenly my foot gave way and I went crashing into the hydrangea below. Whilst extricating myself from the mess (it now looks like Vanessa Feltz has used my favourite shrub as a cushion) who should come trotting round the corner to meet me? Correct.......

Ciao

M xxx

Filling in some background......

Hello all my little darlings! I hope you're all enjoying the sunshine! Personally, i'm not keen on the heat. Neither do I enjoy the fact that every good looking, tanned, toned, gym addicted Adonis finds it necessary to strip down to the waist as soon as the sun comes out! I mean, it's not that they're not attractive to look at (though, it is somewhat distracting when driving! I've had some very close calls with lampposts/post boxes/cars/the elderly in the past!)) but they make me feel so bad about myself! When you have an arse that looks like two dogs fighting in a blanket it is expected that it remains covered. Well, why can the opposite not be true?!

Speaking of dogs, I've received a few requests to fill in a little background with regards the animals in my life, so i'm going to give you a little look at my babies.

These pictures were taken in May when Nathan and I took a trip to Devon with my Sister and her fiance. Denny, the Staffordshire Bull Terrier, is about 3 years old now. We've had her since she was about nine months. Strictly speaking, Denny is my dog and Bruce is Nathan's. She's a complete softy and I swear she believes she is human. Indeed, at night, Denny sleeps beside me in the crook of my neck. I can't say it does much in the way of encouraging.....shall we say.....passion in the boudoir. But then after four years, two full time jobs and a lifetime of hoovering, I think Nathan and I are beyond that anyway! Often reminds me of that Victoria Wood song 'Let's do it tonight'.... if you haven't heard it, search on 'you tube'. A very amusing caricature! Anyway....here she is:

And again!

And again, this time snoozing away a sunny afternoon with Archie....

Now for the big fella. Nathan and I rescued Bruce about a year ago. He was, and still is to some degree, a stressed dog. But after tonnes of training, mopping up a million little accidents and losing more knitting needles and pattern books to his jaws than I care to mention, I think he is finally settling into a more relaxed maturity. Bruce is coming up five now and consistently behaves as if he's just taken a hit of marijuana. I've never known such a soppy hound! He is forever walking into walls!

Just last night I was merrily (I say merrily, I was actually cursing with every movement)bouncing around on my wii fit console ('bouncing' is definitely the appropriate word) and my little cyber instructor ( I hate her, the smug cow) ordered me to drop and do ten repeats of the 'Jack Knife'. Well, as I flailed around on my back trying to hoist my own body weight more than an inch off of the ground ("keep in time to the beeps now", "did you just lift your foot off of the board?", " your muscles wont train themselves, you know" Arrrggghhhh I hate her!) the doggies thought it was great fun and that Daddy Mark was having a game. Have you tried doing a 'jack knife' (why doesn't she just call them sit ups?!) with a 35kg Dobermann plonking his horse-like body on top of your stomach and a Staffy who is determined to sit on your face????

***Incidentally, I hope that my dear readers don't find my over-use of parenthesis distracting. In case anybody is wondering, I do actually often talk like that!***

Nonetheless, I was pleased to complete an hour of exercise (all the while Nathan kindly called support from the kitchen like "have you seen the bread knife?" and "we're nearly out of milk"........ ) before giving up and I had actually worked up quite a sweat. I've yet to decide whether that was due to the heat or actually exerting myself.

I had a great result last night too! After reading Sukhi's post on http://artisticsukhi.blogspot.com/ I dashed straight into my local LIDL and picked up a real bargain! 40 spools of sewing thread in assorted colours (100M EACH SPOOL) for £3.99!!! LOVE to get myself a bargain and this will be a great back up stash to have in my workshop! Furthermore, having finally got my hands on some red thread I was able to dig out my deep red cotton fabric and start work on a basic shopping tote. This is going to be the first thing that I've made for myself in ages and, while not particularly exciting or adventurous, it'll get used loads and will go perfectly with my new summer shoes! Wahoo!

Yesterday I made a fantastic discovery on the Folksy shop 'ClaraBows'. She makes wonderfully scented soy candles and pours them into vintage teacup and saucer sets, giftwraps them and offers them for sale! What a brilliant idea! I have a real thing about vintage crockery and have loads of tea/coffee services, teapots and cake stands etc. I love making a real 'event' out of having tea. Plus, it can be a great distraction when you have unexpected guests but little to no idea how you are going to entertain them. If you can produce a big pot of tea, a wacky tea-cosy and a cake stand stuffed with little delights, you are bound to get the conversation flowing and send your guests home feeling content and indulged! Here is my favourite tea service (sadly without a matching teapot) and a tea cosy I hand knitted from a pattern by The Natural Dye Studio.

Pretty, huh? I'm thinking of completely copying my good friend Hotdog and having a competition on my blog. The only problem is, I have very little idea what anyone would like to win. Does anybody have any suggestions? I can make something new, or use something from my existing stock.... Your wish is my command. Just my way of saying thank you to all the lovely people that have joined me and supported me thus far.

I'll close here as nothing much else to report. I should be back tomorrow or over the weekend to update on the progress of my makes. I really must get down to something creative instead of blogging all the time! Much as I enjoy it, soon i'll be blogging about blogging which wont be interesting for either party.... OH! And i'll scan in my sketches for a new design that i'm working on for a ladies summer top. This one won't be knitted but run up on the sewing machine! Very exciting stuff!

Love and light

M xxx

Nathan Returns....

I'll begin this post with a brief update on the whole cooking situation. Not because I want to, but because others have told me that it is necessary. OK, so Nathan told me I had to post about it whilst he was laughing at me down the telephone. It now appears that throwing my cold soup all over the kitchen floor early last week was merely the beginning of my problems. On Wednesday night I was determined to actually enjoy a hot meal so dashed out and bought a very healthy salmon and green vegetable thing. It was only a microwave meal - i've already made my culinary ineptitude quite clear, so I refuse to apologise for it! After banging, cursing and generally abusing the microwave for ten minutes, I phoned Nathan for some advice.

"What's up? I'm spinning."

OH are you!!!! Well PARdon ME for TRYING to feed myself!

After a few minutes of guided investigation it turned out that I had plugged the blender in, not the microwave. Mmmmmmm......... I wont bother to regale you with further stories of burnt omelettes and exploding pasta sauces. Lets just say that, come the weekend, I was more than happy to confine myself to salads. It's probably not a bad thing, really. I've just purchased one of those Wii Fit consoles in the hope that I can shift some weight in the next two months before my sister's wedding. Failure to do so will result in the construction or purchase of a male corset (don't think I wouldn't!). I dare say that there will be some stories to tell on this, so watch this space!

To return, loosely, to the crafting world.... I was ecstatic today to receive an award! The whimsical (and now my best buddy! Shallow? Moi?!!!) 'Oddsox' very kindly sent me an award for having a lovely blog! I never win anything! Nothing. I can't even win a tin of baked beans on a tombola so I am completely overwhelmed. Especially considering that I have not been blogging for any length of time at all. I'm also reliably informed that this will also be featured on Twitter. If it hadn't taken me about nine months to finally work out how to use FACEBOOK, I expect I would be more excited by the prospect! I mean, women conceive, grow and give birth to babies in less time than it took me to master it! ***Perhaps what I am most bitter about with my Facebook experiences is the fact that when I was actually able to comprehend what was going on, I realised that I didn't actually like it! What a waste of time!***And here is my award in all its glory:

Isn't that just wonderful? I don't wish to turn into one of those awful, gushing women (though I seem to have a natural propensity!) but little surprises like this really do make me feel welcomed into the crafting community. I just love it! I will, very soon, be passing on the honour, though I'm afraid this must wait for a short while because I have so much more to cover today. Anyway, Oddsox, I accept your award and wholly agree that I am simply fabulous! *Just playing in case anyone is considering sending me hate mail for complete arrogance*

Luckily my darling Nathan returned from Woolfest today, completely laden down with goodies. It really is true what they say about absence making the heart grow fonder. I have truly missed him. Of course, as an eternal realist I am also acutely aware that it will, more than likely, only be a matter of hours before I am berating him for not taking the bins out or leaving his wet towel on the floor or some such minor irritation. Hey, I cost a little more and I am quite high maintenance but I think I'm worth it!!!

And apparently he does too! Just look at all of the presents I was given upon his return! This gorgeous little item was sold to him by the British Coloured Sheep Society, courtesy of Carole Keats. I met Carole a few months back when a few of us descended on her workshop and spent many interesting hours discussing her spinning and weaving. Carole has a fantastic eye for colour and produces some of the most gorgeous yarns, particularly through her skilled use of angelina fibres which gives her items a fantastic sparkle. I am like a Magpie. Show me anything shiny and I'll be sure to like it. You can check Carole out on her website http://www.willowclosestudio.co.uk/ but you cannot hope to truly appreciate her skills without tracking her down on the UK exhibition circuit and actually getting up close to her creations. I'm a naturally tactile person anyway, but gazing at all of those carefully blended colours and oh-so-soft fibres always seems like an open invitation for me to plunge my hands in and have a rummage. It's a wonder that Carole lets me near her stock!

Nathan also bought me this fantastic title by Ruth Lee. I've thumbed through his Mum's copy many times when visiting her in Scotland so I'm pleased to finally have one of my own! This is a great coffee table book. Patterns can be so prescriptive at times and when you have one of those days where you feel that you need to break down the boundaries of knitting, this will be your inspiration. Or rather, mine! Go and buy your own!

Nathan also got me a lovely felting kit, but I am not going to discuss that with you now as I have a few ideas in the pipeline and wouldn't want to spoil the surprise. In fact, talking of ideas - does anybody else out there feel like a modern day Miss Havisham?! I am slowly accumulating so many supplies and vast numbers of patterns and ideas that I can see me very shortly being sat, enrobed in not an aged wedding dress, but a jumble of half finished knitted garments....by my side a table, not filled with a decaying wedding banquet but bags and bags of moth eaten yarn and yellowing pattern books..... Just me? When will I EVER have the time to do all these things that I plan? Nathan nearly slaps me every time I tentatively suggest taking up yet another hobby. Indeed, after our visit to Carole Keats I was caught looking online at triangle looms and was pretty much told it was him or the loom. Well, it is such a pain moving house, so I let him have that one!!!!

Evidently, Nathan spent quite a lot of time at the Woolfest with Julietta from http://www.knitshop,co.uk/ I met Julietta a while back and she is a most charming woman. I am so jealous that Nathan got to spend so much time with her as she is definitely somebody that I would like to get to know better. She stocks a prolific range of felting and knitting goods on her website and I am reliably informed that she is due to open her own shop in Central London in the coming weeks, so look out for her! I wish her all the very best in her new venture! As an aside, if anybody wants to try knitting with something that is durable, unique and amazing value (when knitted up it looks as if it should have cost an awful lot of money) then may I suggest trying Julietta's cotton/linen blend yarn. Really is wonderful stuff!

But goodness me! I keep telling all of you how wonderful other peoples things are. Mine are also very very good! Drop in on my Etsy/Folksy shop and browse around (or better still -buy! I have a corset to purchase, you know!) I should be adding some new items later this week. Especially since Nathan's Mum gifted me a tonne of pencil rovings (pictured below) which should look amazing when knitted up and felted. The muted tones of this fibre immediately made me think mock vintage, so I think I'll make some kind of felted handbag with vintage embellishments.

I think that's it for now really. I do try to punctuate my writing with the odd bit of humour, but when I begin to bore even myself I know that it is usually a good time to stop! Besides, now that Nathan is back I'm looking forward to a proper meal!

Until next time, my dears.....

M xxx

All By Myself...

So...... dum de dum....

Nothing much has happened here. Certainly nothing very crafty. Nathan hopped on the overnight train to Inverness last night. He volunteered to help his Mum with her exhibition stand at 'Woolfest' this year, so the poor little sausage has to drag himself all the way to Scotland to collect her and all her goodies, back down to Cumbria (where he is staying in a tent for the duration!!! Can you imagine?! Needless to say, they didn't even bother to invite me!) only to travel all the way back up to Scotland to catch the London train! I've a feeling he may be a little tired when he gets back which should certainly help my performance of the annual 'I need a holiday' speech.

Mind you, I say that I haven't done anything crafty. I did crochet some lovely roll cuffed baby boots from some leftover Merino wool that I found in my workshop. A very basic pattern but I thought they came up quite nicely. I'll post pictures soon. I'm still debating whether or not to felt them slightly as it can have such a great effect on toddler footwear. I'm going to go and buy some fabric this weekend so that I can start making one of my vintage bag patterns. Very exciting!

Other than that I have nothing to report, i'm afraid. With Nathan gone I am left to fend for myself and unfortunately that means feeding myself! Given that i'd rather use my oven for storing sweaters than I would to roast a chicken, it is something of a given that I will, at some point, have a horrific kitchen experience. Last night I thought I'd play it safe. What could possibly go wrong with shop-bought gazpacho? No cooking involved, no heating involved. Just open and eat. Except.....well......my floor got most of, and the smidgen that I did have clinging to the sides of my dish were.... how can I put this? REVOLTING. Cold soup? Cold soup? I should have known. Its like oven roasting a salad. Just. Plain. Wrong.

Are you sitting comfortably?

Then I'll begin.......

Apologies for not posting last night. I've been so busy these last few days that after arriving home from work yesterday and pouring myself a glass of chilled pear cider, I collapsed onto the sofa and fell asleep with Toni Braxton crooning quietly from the stereo. Cut to 9pm and Nathan returns from the allotment. It is somewhat difficult to remain in slumber-land when your partner is thrusting a plastic dish of home-grown new potatoes under your nose (unwashed, I might add) and saying 'look, LOOK, the FIRST crop THIS year' with a gleeful smile. Anyway, suffice to say I was extremely tired......

But let's get down to business! While I am reluctant to allow my blog to become a series of reviews of the work of others, I feel duty bound to let you in on my latest purchase. Having tracked down my parcel from Amazon on Wednesday (just how irritating is Royal Mail when you pay an additional charge to have something delivered first class, only to be subjected to one of those floppy, barely readable cards that merrily informs you that, owing to the size of your parcel, you have no option but to drive all the way down to your local P.O. sorting office and collect it yourself')I was delighted to spend the next couple of hours ohhing and ahhhing over the lovely book I now owned! Emma Brennan's 'Making Vintage Bags' is certainly one of my better purchases! The cover of this book does not do justice to the content within:

I will admit that, although the book professes to offer 20 original sewing patterns, there are more like a dozen or so with some bags differing only in terms of the fabric choice and embellishments used. Nonetheless, this is still a fabulous book. Emma's instructions are clear and concise which is perfect for the beginner sewer. Furthermore, there is something fundamentally inspirational about the way this book is produced. I cannot put my finger on it but something within these pages genuinely compelled me through an amazing creative journey and I have, thus far, spent many happy hours contempleting various ways of making these designs my own. All this before I even sit down to make one! I would certainly recommend this title.

Perhaps I ought to explain the motivation behind my getting this book? My good friend Zola Purdie recently donated a rather gorgeous vintage sewing machine to me. It is a lovely Singer 201K from 1958 and runs like a dream. I swear, I am no engineer and about as far away from your typical man as I could get (please keep the eyebrow raising to a minimum - I know it was an obvious statement to make!) but this little machine actually feels like quality! Anyway, I was, up until this little gift, only really a fibre fiend. I knitted, crocheted, spun etc but had never really thought about delving into fabric/textile crafts (well, no more so than to imagine my glory at wrestling some gorgeous slip of a thing into a Dior-like creation that just happened to be made by MOI!). So essentially, yes, this was my starting point for my foray into the sewing world. I wanted something small and relatively simple to begin with, but did not want to compromise on style. I'll let you know how I get on.....

Incidentally, Zola has just recently sent me some pictures of her latest 'make'. This is all her own design and made specially for her darling neice. Isn't it adorable?!

Zola has just started writing her own blog - check it out at http://www.cocobelissimo.blogspot.com Although I am slightly biased, you really couldn't hope for a nicer, more genuine or funny blogger!

Now for something a tad more strange. Picture me, sitting at work yesterday, almost noon and I am tap-tap-tapping away on the keyboard of my computer. Suddenly the mobile rings - Nathan. I answer and am immediately advised (and I mean immediately - Nathan has no patience when he is excited and I did not even manage to get out a tentative "hello?")that I am now the, and I quote, proud owner of half a flock of sheep.

Err.... excuse me? Evidently Nathan's mum, Gill from Artisan Threads, has 'gone halves' (what does that mean??!!!) with us on a flock of sheep, arriving on her land in Scotland next week. Very nice, me-thinks! I love all animals and sheep are no different. I begin picturing myself shearing them by hand (who am I kidding? I've just had a manicure!) and rhythmically spinning the wool into yarn on our old Ashford traditional spinning wheel. That is, of course, until I am reminded that Nathan's mother is slightly more, shall we say, organic? Rural? than I am and therefore it would only be a matter of time before next years lambs are slaughtered for their meat. Only now do I see the irony in the fact that my favourite film is 'The Silence of the Lambs'. Please, please, please people - leave your comments here to back up my claim that my sheep should be seen as pets and I am certainly NOT a farmer!!!!

ARGHHHHH

Goodness me, the last two days have been a total nightmare. Have had all sorts of problems with our internet connection and have only just got back up and running. A million and one things to do now and, perhaps more importantly, a million and one things to tell all YOU guys about!

I really must dash for now but I promise to leave a post tonight! I'll cover everything from baby's bibs to my latest purchases AND sheep! Dont ask......

Look at me!!!

Well look at me! Who'd have thought that my blog and shops could look so professional?! Of course, I haven't become a technical wizard overnight. No, 'Blogspot' and 'Etsy' do make it very easy to achieve excellent results so a big THANK YOU to the angels of cyber space!

In between messing around with the various items in my own online shops, I also spent some time browsing other peoples creations and I simply have to share one little treasure with you all. 'Hotdog and Me' http://www.folksy.com/shops/hotdogandme is a fabulous little Folksy shop selling the most adorable doggie softies! When I embarked on my crafting life I was convinced that handmade products had to have a purpose, a specific use, to make them worthwhile. Gradually, however, my opinion has changed. In todays high speed, high risk, high cholesterol, high stress and high priced world it is a rarity to find something to smile about. But these cute little hounds made me do just that! Smile. So forget the credit crunch, rising unemployment and outrageous living costs and take a moment to enjoy these guys! Hell, if you are able, you could even adopt one and take him or her home with you! And the names! I couldn't help but chuckle, particularly at 'Hubert Woofswell'!

Mind you, it is not surprising that 'Hotdog' struck a chord with me. I own a Staffordshire Bull Terrier called Denny and a Dobermann named Bruce and they are my BABIES! I love them to bits! There is nothing better than snuggling up with a playmate who is not too self-aware to show their affection. I love my dogs and I KNOW that they love me back!

Anyways, it looks like I've finally got my shops sorted now so fingers crossed for that first sale. I'm thinking of having an opening offer to start the ball rolling. Maybe 10% off everything for the first week? I don't know. I'll think about it!

Also, it is my sister's wedding coming up in September, so i'm desperately trying to come up with some ideas for a knitted gift of some kind that she could use on the day. I did think if a lace garter but that will be entirely useless after the event. Not the kind of thing you can artfully display in your living room as a memento, is it?! Any ideas?

M xxx

WHAT A DAY!!!

Goodness me! I have had such a ridiculously busy day! So much for my optimistic declaration that this weekend would see the re-launch of my shop on Etsy and Folksy! I've added about a dozen items to my Etsy shop, nothing on Folksy and still have tonnes to do tomorrow! I've spent most of the afternoon taking numerous shots of each piece that I've made. For this delightful task I decided to descend on my poor Dad with three huge canvas bags of stock. The reason for this is simple - although my house is clean and tidy, it isn't the most glamourous canvas on which to pose ones goodies! My Dad's place, however, is packed full of stunning antiques and comes with the added bonus of my stepmum, who is always happy to lend a hand in anything 'arty'. Indeed, we've had such fun positioning and re-positioning my knitted goodies and playing with props and backgrounds that i'm desperately hoping the pictures don't look too contrived!!! Still, it's art daaarling!

This is purely a personal thing, but here is my favourite picture that we took of a jumper that I finished and seamed this morning!

Just a short post today as i'm absolutely exhausted! Nevertheless, I thought you may like to see Archie out in the garden with his new collar and micro-chip!

And so it begins....

I love to talk. I can't help it, I just do. If I can't talk about the subjects I like, I read about them. I make lists. I spend hours on the phone to bored friends and relatives, expounding the virtues of the 'handmade revolution'. Whole days go by whilst I aimlessly float around the cyber universe on the hunt for inspiration or supplies. While my partner readily shares my interests, even he can struggle to comprehend the speed with which I move from one pattern/project/obsession to another. So, before I lose him as an audience completely (there have been more than a few exasperated sighs in recent weeks as I rummage through my bag in the middle of dinner to decant some new pattern or borrowed book)I've decided to start this blog. I don’t pretend to be qualified; I just figured that somebody, somewhere, would share my enthusiasm. So here is my open invitation to anybody out there – leave a comment, get in touch, share your thoughts, recommend a book, site or blog. Don’t be shy! I’m certainly not ;-)

I guess it’s fitting that I am starting the blog now. This weekend will see the re-launch of my shop on both the ‘Etsy’ and ‘Folksy’ sites. Please go along and see the somewhat eclectic collection of handmade goodies on offer! My shop name is Mother’s Ruin, not just because gin happens to be my favourite tipple and is often a large part of my, shall we call it, ‘design making’ process, but also for the many and varied connotations that the phrase has. All good fun in my opinion! Of course, having the technological know-how of an as-yet undiscovered sea creature from the depths of the Pacific will, no doubt, cause me a few problems. On this count I am desperately hoping that my already put upon friends can offer some sound advice or, better still, do things for me! Watch this space for a link to my shop!



Before we get down to the knitty gritty (no pun intended) of crafting, I guess it is only fair that I slowly introduce you to my family. I'll start with this little terror. This is Archie, my beautiful and incredibly vocal bengal cat! I'm beginning with him for the simply reason that he may not be with us much longer. Up until now he has always been a house cat which worked perfectly for me, prone to hysteria wherever my animals are concerned. Only, after pushing open my kitchen window at the end of May, Archie decided to go on a little adventure for ten days and has only just condescended to re-join the household! Needless to say this was quickly met with a trip to the vets for a new microchip and collar. Panic over.....
*I must point out that he doesn't always look quite so disdainful! *
Still, I can't ignore the fact that he wants to be out and about, so i'm just desperately hoping that he'll gradually reduce the length of time that he feels necessary to punish me with his absence! Honestly, why do our feline friends always have such attitudes?!

I also have two gorgeous dogs, Denny and Bruce, but you'll hear more about them later....

Ciao for now

Mark xxx

Watch this space for the first instalment of my new blog.

The last 18 months have been a rollercoaster of new crafting experiences and i'm afraid that is all that qualifies me to write on the subject. Still, are you along for the ride?